And in today's totally-unrelated-to-journalism amusements...

Maybe there's a lesson to be learned about the power of editing to convey many different stories from the same material? Or maybe... just maybe!... we can all enjoy the inherent creepiness of red Swingline staplers.

Office Space: Redux

"...because I told, I told Bill that if they move my desk one more time, then, then I'm, I'm quitting, I'm going to quit. And, and I told Don too, because they've moved my desk four times already this year, and I used to be over by the window, and I could see the squirrels, and they were married, but then, they switched from the Swingline to the Boston stapler, but I kept my Swingline stapler because it didn't bind up as much, and I kept the staples for the Swingline stapler and it's not okay because if they take my stapler then I'll set the building on fire..." - Milton